I was all set to sarcastically pounce (or dump) all over the “Bro-dal Shower” idea. My initial thought was to roll my eyes very far into the back of my head thinking this sounds so over-the-top metro-sexual hipster. But, I decided to chill on my “old curmudgeonly” thoughts, stop myself from being …, and take a different perspective on this “new” tradition. Let’s consider the the Bro-dal Shower.
Lauren Zaser / Justine Zwiebel / BuzzFeed Life
Men have long been, willing or unwilling, participants in a tradition of sex and drinking to celebrate the death of bachelorhood. For many of us this is not something we want to do or participate in even though it feels like we are supposed to. For the record, I am one of the “I don’t want to do that!” bro’s. Though, technically speaking, I have not been a bachelor for many years and I have certainly been to enough parties in my day. So done that.
Women have, in the last 30 plus years rightfully embraced the sexual revolution and created the Bachelorette Party, a separate event from the Bridal Shower, so they too can drink, express their sexuality and, willing or unwilling, celebrate the death of being a single lady.
Maybe it is time to modernize the traditions. With the SCOTUS decision to expand the right to marry to same-sex couples it only seems right to take this old tradition and bring it into the 21st century. Modernize it.
The interesting thing about the word “bro” is that it is increasingly becoming gender neutral – as in, “party-on, bro”. So in essence the Bro-dal Shower makes sense for the couple’s shower too. And why not. Why not have a celebration where both members of the couple can come together with their friends and celebrate, play games and give favors & gifts. Sure, you could have separate parties as well – if that’s what you want. The awesome thing about the Bro-dal Shower is the group inclusion it offers over the exclusion. Together a couple can learn more about each other, sharing the memory of this event together adding another bond linking them together.
Now I don’t want to take away from the men the idea that they could have their own shower, or that either person has to give up the bachelor or bachelorette party. But, it’s 2015. Lets take these traditions and stop making them about the sexuality or gender of the person and make them about the couple. Gay, Straight or wherever you fit on the scale, celebrate as a couple, or separately if that is what you want, but, let’s do it with a feeling of equality. Let’s refresh the old traditions and make them new again.
Bro-dal Shower may not have been my first pick as a name for this event but I do get it. It’s better than the now gender-neutral “dude” – A Brief History of Dude. I don’t think “Dude-Dal Shower” would work. “Duuuude, are you gonna be at my Dude-Dal Shower?”
As a society we love to seperate the brides and grooms before they get married. Bash them over the head with all the things they will be giving up now that they are adding a ball to the relationship chain. Gay couples were not able, until recently, to go down this path. Many of us chose to celebrate our coupling together with friends and/or family. Let’s combine the two. We are in an amazing time. We are moving forward. We are evolving. We are celebrating the love between two people. In a sense we are all “Bro’s” so lets throw a “Bro-dal Shower” and celebrate our love together.
Party on Bro.